Saturn, the goat and humility
Whatever it is that we want to accomplish in our lives, we know that it will require some time, some work, and some grace. Even if we never accomplished something that is meaningful to ourselves — those who did always remind us that it’s truly about long-term commitment.
It could be writing a book or losing weight. It could be starting a business from scratch and turning it into a profitable entity that pays for our lavish desires. It could be being committed to the person we love, and holding each other’s hand despite life’s up and downs. And so on.
Despite “knowing” this however, the best of us only act on their goals for a few days before giving up while the majority of us barely take action after the “idea” phase.
If we want to reach the peak of human evolution, it’s vital that we understand this: We are creative beings. Living is creating. And, we are always creating whether through art, through work, through connecting with others, through learning skills, etc.
Unfortunately, or fortunately, if we look at it from a healthy perspective — what we consider to be “normal” in our world looks absolutely insane from a higher perspective. We believe our ways are normal, and we live according to those ways because that’s practically what everyone else does.
If we were to pay more attention to how we think however, and how this thinking creates irrational emotions, and how these emotions go on to create the conflicting existence we call “life on Earth” — the wars, the arguments, the suffering, the degeneration, the hatred, the coldness and the brutality all mixed up with some occasional pleasantries which make such an existence seem worthwhile; normal wouldn’t feel right.
And even if it doesn’t feel right — we would still be surrounded by billions of other human beings who firmly believe this is all there is to life.
These human beings would go on to raise children, and affect them with the same “viruses” they took in, which would only perpetuate the unhealthy cycles we witness today. These human beings would go on to talk about their beliefs that have been reinforced by their peers’ beliefs, and before we realize it — our irrational ways dominate the world we live in!
We’re one. The “collective.” Full circle.
Now, let’s get back to our subject…
Of these unhealthy dynamics most of us are born into, and have to battle our way through life with — there is this limiting belief that making mistakes makes us into a “bad” person.
Reading this may feel weird at first, or a total confirmation of your experience. But give it some thought. Remember, we are shortsighted when it comes to those things we consider to be normal…
Unless we are the Greek god of perfection — Perphektiό; no human being can be perfect. It doesn’t exist — just like this “god” doesn’t, which I hope you didn’t look up…
The simplest proof that we are imperfect is the fact that we are on Earth right now. Unless we had a body, which is assumed to be the case since you are reading this, how would we interact with our surroundings — and why do we interact in the first place?
To learn! We are here to learn. We are here to be challenged. Without challenges, we don’t learn!
Yet, most of us have been heavily conditioned to feel bad about ourselves for making mistakes. Most of us have grown up with the habit of feeling like something is wrong with us because we made mistakes. Most of us still blame ourselves for the past, and most of the time, for things we weren’t even responsible for!
Whatever it is that we want to accomplish in our lives, we all know that it will require some time, some work, and some grace. Even if we never accomplished something that is meaningful to ourselves — those who did always remind us that it’s truly about long-term commitment.
What happens when we identify with our shortcomings is that we build the habit of feeling bad about ourselves whenever something doesn’t go according to plan. What we don’t realize in reasoning this way, especially while pursuing a long-term goal is that we keep hitting the brakes.
The more our self-image is associated with our shortcomings, the less likely we are to start. And if we do start, unless we decide to look into the matter, it’s very difficult not to give up on our dreams.
You would think that determination, perseverance, faith, tenacity — which are more or less the same vital element to human transformation — come from brute forcing our way through life. From listening to one motivational video after the other. From repeating affirmations till we put ourselves to sleep. From sticking quotes at home and at work. And so on.
These help…
But if you’ve worked with it, sooner or later it feels like too much. There must be an easier way to get there, although it may require more attention.
And what is this way?
Don’t evaluate yourself based on your mistakes. And to do it healthily, and even go a step further in your evolution — don’t evaluate yourself based on your accomplishments.
It’s easier to start with not evaluating ourselves based on mistakes. The other one takes more time. And it’s always best to just start — so do it.
What happens when you stop identifying with your mistakes is interesting to say the least. Most people unconsciously believe that holding on to their mistakes means they won’t repeat them. There is a difference however between learning from our mistakes, and clinging to them emotionally.
When we are emotionally invested in our past, we feed the pattern with our energy through our emotions. And naturally, overtime, it may manifest in different forms.
What we want to do instead is learn from our mistakes. Since we’ve understood that being here means that we have things to learn, and that life is about learning — all that’s left to do is to adapt, change our approach, and keep going!
Indirectly, such an approach to living teaches us humility. A rarity in today’s world.
The self-image doesn’t need to be impacted by the learning journey.
This is what it means to persevere, to keep going, and as long as we do — in time, we reach our destination. It’s the physics of life.
What to do: You don’t need to do crazy things to be determined and see your goals happen, whatever they are — you just need to become aware of how you are always defining yourself based on your past, on your shortcomings, on what you could have done better, etc.
Just see it. Don’t try to change it. Just become aware of it. The rest will take care of itself.
All the best is wished to you and yours.
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Blessings.