How Can You Be Yourself When You Don’t Even Like Being Yourself?

Photo by Aron Visuals on Unsplash

First of all, why don’t we like being ourselves in the first place?

Did you ask yourself this question? Why don’t you like being yourself?

Is it because your abs don’t show up? Is it because you have an older phone? Is it because you have a hard time connecting with others? Is it because you find yourself to be weird — perhaps you have an unusual way of laughing? Is it because you are an adult but like anime and play video games? Is it because you do not want to put too much pressure on yourself, and live more peacefully? Etc.

Although you may think that the above, or similar examples, only concerns you — I am here to tell you that it does not. Nearly every human being on this beautiful planet has some form of insecurity. Nearly everyone longs for an idealistic life they have been sold by myths, mainstream media, advertising, Hollywood, and so on.

And the more we yearn for an ideal we have been sold by the world, instead of one that is aligned with our path — the less appreciation we have for ourselves, for our lives, and the gift of living. And as you may know, the less appreciative we are — the more miserable our lives get.

Appreciation does not mean being okay with everything in your life, and just sitting there; waiting for a miracle to happen. No. Appreciation means going back to yourself, and asking one fundamental question:

Do these things I have been programmed to pursue actually matter for me and my path?

If they do, then by all means, go for it.

But because you asked this question, they probably don’t.

So I would suggest you go within yourself, do some introspection and ask yourself what truly matters for you. You may have attachments to the “culture,” and what it tells you you should do. You will have to pay attention to those attachments. What do they “say”?

Do you want to reach those goals because you don’t want to look like you don’t know what you are doing with your life? Do you want to marry because you fear loneliness? Do you want to have a big car so that your friends keep you in high regard? Do you want to be successful because that’s what society worships?

During this introspection process, it is important to be honest with ourselves. No one is there to judge you. You are doing this for your own peace and growth. Look at the facts. Most people are scared to do it. Don’t be. Look at the facts. The more you see them for what they are, the stronger the effects.

As you become aware of how those ideals you have accepted as such aren’t really ideals, but means for people to compensate for their insecurities — naturally, you discard them. And in doing so, you get to meet yourself for the first time.

And you may realize that your humaneness has always been a gift. And in this realization, you won’t be able to help it — you will just be you, and it won’t matter what people think of it because not being yourself will be more painful than looking good through lies.

I hope that this answer helped.


If you would like to approach your spiritual growth and healing from a practical place, one that doesn’t leave you in the air with abstract concepts that get you nowhere — but one that actually helps you experience deeper growth; I invite you to subscribe to my newsletter from where I help you with that.


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