Do We Have The Power to Change Ourselves?

Photo by Sanni Sahil on Unsplash

We are all born with certain traits; “weaknesses” and “strengths” that originate from different sources. This is what we have at the start of our journey. The good and the ugly. We are also all born with a desire, an intention for our lifetime — this is a promise, a potential.

It is important to be aware that human beings, in general, do not like change. Yes, we never stop wishing for things to be different — but as you may well know, wishes alone don’t make much happen. Deep inside, we are attached to the way things are. As an example, even if we have been poor for many years while craving to experience material wealth for as many years — when we suddenly get the wealth, like it happened with many lottery winners; we unconsciously “waste” it.

Why? We didn’t have much money. We yearned for wealth. We got it. Then why did we waste it?

Because unconsciously, we are habituated to not having enough, or as much as we wish to have. Out of our past experiences, we have come to believe/accept that we do not deserve more money than we were able to get up to this point in our life. Our beliefs basically “lock” us in a cage. This is the known, what feels “normal” and “safe” for us.

And in our example above, getting more than the known creates a feeling of imbalance in us; which we express at a conscious level by overspending money on useless things, giving it away to please people, and using every opportunity we get to “wash” our hands from this unusual amount of money.


The desires we have, the ones that keep us awake at night — regardless of how impossible they may seem to achieve for others; those desires are a promise. Our desires direct us on the path our soul chose to walk in our current lifetime.

Do most act on their desires? Obviously, we are not referring to impulsive desires like wanting a bigger car to feel better than our neighbor. Take some time out, meditate, breathe deeply, think about what you want for your life, use a journal. And once you have calmed yourself, what comes to the surface of your mind? What would you like to do with your life? What path excites and invigorates you with life? Note it down.

Most people have a sense of what they would like to do with their lives. It’s just because their parents or teachers told them to stop “dreaming” that they created limitations for themselves. Deep inside yourself, you know where you want to go.

This path is your promise. And it is the first step to true change.

But here’s the thing. For a big part of your life, you have been accustomed to the path you are currently on — and however unpleasant it may feel for you, you’d rather stay on it because it feels safe.

So you have two forces at play. A) Your past with its immense momentum. B) Your potential with its immense promise of growth, fulfillment and aliveness.

What stands between A and B?

Our mind. Our assumptions. Our lack of understanding. Our unresolved issues. Our limited ways of thinking. And obviously, these prevent us from taking the right action to get where we want to go.

The physical domain we find ourselves in is basically “ruled” by action. Action is not what we should worry about. Once we have freed ourselves from limiting patterns, actions follow naturally. Think about how you don’t think when one of your people is in danger — you just act, and you make the impossible possible. Because you don’t think much 😉

The opposite is also true. You want to be wealthy, but you have always felt like you didn’t have enough. Which thoughts would come to your mind if someone told you that you were destined to be a billionaire? “Me?! Get out of here!” It says a lot…

Change therefore starts internally before it is reflected outwardly.

Do you have the power to change yourself internally? Let’s see.

Are you an adult trying hard to finally earn your dad’s validation through your career accomplishments? Are you being competitive and ruthless with others because you had to fight with your siblings for your parents to notice you? Are you doing what you are doing to prove someone from your past how wrong they were? Are you still angry because you’ve been deeply hurt in the past? Do you waste extra money because your max has always been $1,500 /month? Do you tell yourself and others that you can’t change because an astrologer or psychic said you were “cursed”?

Together, all these unresolved issues maintain your “story” in place. This story, with its beliefs and emotional residues is the “ego.”

Now here is the thing; the person we ought to be is nothing like the person we currently are. Sure, changing as a person doesn’t necessarily change our physical appearance — even if some try to feel better about themselves by doing so… Changing as a person means transforming as a person. It means releasing all these things about ourselves we cling so tightly to.

And for most, this is scary, it is demanding, and not everyone is ready for it.

This journey takes us deep within ourselves. It drives us to ask questions, and to look at ourselves as we truly are. While there is no definite direction for getting there — the road always starts with the same step, look within. Start here. Start now. Just start.

I hope your question was answered.

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