We’re brought up in a world that makes us think lowly of ourselves. Yes, at an unconscious level, we do just that.
Right from our childhood, we’re told to be like the neighbor’s kid, or as smart as our father, or as refined as our grandma. You get the idea.
Without being fully aware of it, we grow up with an unhealthy belief at the root of our psyche, the belief that we’re not good enough, and that we should do more, and better, and even more than that. Ugh.
Eventually, this thinking process becomes compulsive.
We develop unrealistic expectations from ourselves.
We push ourselves to extreme levels because it’s celebrated in this world — everyone is lazy, and the great ones got where they got by doing what they had to do. What they had to do however killed them in most cases, and if it didn’t, it ruined their relationships, it destroyed their health. But because there’s money in it, and because money is god for most, we overlook the bigger picture.
What we don’t realize in living this way is that, as long as we believe that we’re inadequate, not good enough, and sometimes even an error/defective — no matter how much we do, we’ll never believe it’s enough.
It’s a rat race.
Why do we believe we’re not good enough? It starts early in our lives. Most of the time, parents do it unconsciously with their children. They’ve been through the same dynamics. It’s their conditioning that is speaking, actually, not them. Being resentful to our caretakers is futile. We would only be perpetuating the same cycles. Refusing to let our past define our future is more productive.
It’s “normal” in our world to compare ourselves to each other. We love to say we should only compare ourselves to who we were yesterday, but when it’s time to practice, we can’t help but feel low about ourselves because our iPhone is five years old, or because our spouse can’t stop speaking about how great someone else’s house is, or because our fellow spiritual seekers have otherworldly experiences during their meditations while we’re barely able to get past our mind’s worries about next week’s meeting.
Yet, it’s in those exact scenarios that we should catch ourselves, and remind ourselves, “Hey, each one of us is walking a unique path. What I own, be it extravagant or not, doesn’t make me. Wherever I find myself in my life right now, it doesn’t define who I truly am.”
A wise man once said “Fate doesn’t make mistakes.”
It’s hard to believe for most but, wherever we find ourselves right now, it’s exactly where we should be. Only in acknowledging where we are in this very moment, without an iota of resistance, can we take the proper steps to growth.
Another wise man also said “the stiffest tree is the most easily cracked while the bamboo or willow survives by bending with the wind.”
In embracing the situation we find ourselves in, we learn acceptance. Acceptance doesn’t mean laziness or lethargy as most would like to believe — acceptance, from a higher perspective, means acknowledgment, which brings our attention back to the moment, and with that attention, we have enough energy to take the right action and change our situation.
The moment we understand and embrace where we are right now in our lives, we understand that we’re human. Yes. For the first time, we realize what it means to be a human being.
Human beings are full of potential.
What we can accomplish, compared to what we’ve already accomplished, is like an ocean compared to a drop of water. On this path to immense growth however, we will succeed at times, but also fall on our knees, many times.
This is how we learn. Through trial and error. Some days, everything happens effortlessly. On most days however, no matter how hard we push ourselves, not much comes out.
Still, we have to keep doing the work.
You will want to feel bad about yourself, and believe the stories you’ve accepted as being true about yourself, those stories that tell you you’re wrong, that you’re an error, that you’ll never amount to anything. This is your conditioning speaking through you.
Your conditioning will want to make you feel like the victim of your circumstances. It will push you to want to throw the towel. Sometimes you will. But push it back. Move through it.
You are learning a new way of living. You are going against a limiting belief most human beings accept as true. The energetic momentum behind this belief is immense. Yet, you — read that again, YOU — are fighting to change this belief. Not only for yourself, but for the whole world, and beyond!
This is the fight you chose to have, a fight most people would never even dare to imagine having. You, however, are having this very battle. It’s your purpose. And your purpose isn’t only about you, it’s about everyone. That’s why you can’t stop even when you try.
Normal people set goals, exceptional people live with purpose.
Open your eyes beyond the limitations of your conditioning. You are doing hundreds of times better than you think.
Imagine a brain cell among billions of others; this infinitesimal cell trying to change the whole structure of the brain. This cell is you. The brain is the world. The journey may feel intimidating. But it’s normal.
Your work matters. It may not always seem like it does, but it does. One step at a time, you’re creating a new trend, one that will break old dogmatic structures, and build a healthier foundation for future generations.
Keep it up! Do your best. That’s enough! Embrace what is.
Your brother, Rabih.
As a final note.
If you’ve been meditating, using affirmations and thinking positively for a while now, without necessarily integrating spiritual truths at a soul level even though you understand them intellectually — I’ve written a book to help you understand the main blocks to true spiritual growth, and how to overcome them. I’m sure you’re tired of “knowing” about God because you can’t wait to experience God. That’s what we explore in Spiritual Transition. Give the book a look here.